10 tips | How to help your partner with a severe anxiety disorder

Living with anxiety may be difficult; your thoughts may race, you may dread ordinary chores that others take for granted (such as driving to work), and your problems may feel insurmountable. However, loving someone who suffers from anxiety can be difficult as well. You may feel helpless or overwhelmed by your partner’s sentiments and how they influence your everyday existence.

The following are some of the conditions that fall under the anxiety umbrella:

  • generalized anxiety disorder (GAD)
  • social anxiety disorder (social phobia)
  • panic disorder (which sometimes includes agoraphobia)
  • separation anxiety
  • specific phobias

If that’s the case, you’re not alone: Anxiety problems have been linked to marital unhappiness in several studies.

Are you looking for tangible methods to assist a loved one? Consider the following tips.

Learn the signs

Excessive and persistent concern and dread are present in all anxiety disorders, although they manifest in different ways.

Physical symptoms, such as insomnia, stomach upset, and muscular and head discomfort, are usually associated with emotional problems.

It’s possible that your spouse is having a panic attack while driving. They are first apprehensive about driving alone. However, following a second panic attack, they quit driving and try to avoid being in automobiles as much as possible.

Don’t make it about yourself.

“I’m here for you,” or “Let me know how I can best help you,” are good examples. “You don’t think about how it hurts me,” or “You’re so selfish,” are examples of sentences to avoid. It’s easy to get caught up in how your loved one’s anxiety affects you, but taking a step back and recognizing that anxiety is an illness rather than a decision may help your relationship immensely.

Be honest and set expectations.

Are you going to be late? So they don’t picture you mangled in a ditch, give them a call or send a fast SMS. Do you have a large bill to pay or a medical test on the horizon? Don’t attempt to hide it; instead, speak it out. Treating your spouse as if they are a delicate infant, even if you don’t want to bother them, creates an odd dynamic in a relationship.


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Make them feel safe and confort them

One of the anxious person’s greatest fears is that they are unlovable just because they are worried. “We’re in this together, and I’m not going anywhere,” tell them as often as naturally as you can. In fact, right now, take a snapshot of that line and text it to your cuddle pumpkins (really — I’ll stop). It won’t be strange, I swear.

Go on with your life

So your companion is experiencing another round of extra-panic or agoraphobia. It’s difficult to watch someone you care about suffer, and it’s probably far more difficult for them to be experiencing it. However, you can’t or don’t want to miss your best friend’s birthday party or your niece’s graduation. Go. Even if you’re alone and have to inform others that your loved one isn’t feeling well.

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Try couples counseling

Anxiety has a significant influence on relationships.

For one thing, your partner’s anxiousness might stem from their doubts and uneasiness about the success of your relationship.

Anxiety, according to Alves, is typically accompanied by impatience, which can lead to more frequent arguments and a split in the relationship.

“When one spouse suffers from anxiety, the other may feel powerless and overwhelmed because they don’t know how to assist. They may begin to put space between themselves and others in an attempt to receive some relief.”


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Talk about it

Relationships may be strengthened via open communication. Assumptions, on the other hand, have the opposite effect.

Perhaps they don’t express their worry. You assume they don’t want to talk about it, so you don’t say anything. Their anguish becomes something you avoid, if not completely disregard.

It’s always a good idea to inquire about what they do and don’t like.

Forget all you’ve learned about anxiety.

When you haven’t dealt with anxiety yourself, it’s difficult to empathize with your loved one. Investigate the disease on your own. Most individuals are unaware that worry may cause bodily symptoms as well. You will be able to empathize with your loved one’s symptoms the more you understand.

Don’t lose hope and practice patience.

With a severe anxiety illness, it is possible to live a full life. It may feel as if your loved one’s worry will never go away or improve, but it’s critical to be optimistic. Your loved one will be more inclined to take good measures in coping with the disease if he or she feels encouraged. A cheerful mindset may make a big difference.

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Be yourself

It’s not unusual for people who are close to someone who has a severe anxiety illness to get anxiety themselves. Remember why you and your loved one got along in the first place by being positive, having fun, and remembering why you and your loved one got along in the first place. You won’t be able to cure someone who suffers from acute anxiety, but you can offer support. Take some time to consider how your loved one’s extreme anxiety impacts you.